Ever spent some time to decluttering your house or room? We invest time from time to time into gathering unwanted stuff that takes unnecessary room in our house. Gathering everything in the middle of the floor and deciding what brings joy and then throwing away every old bank statements or unused objects. Similarly have you ever thought of gathering task, obligations, regrets, relationships and do a decluttering activity mentally. Well, that makes a lot of sense if you think about it, and by doing so we can effectively focus our time, energy and money on things that matter and that makes us happy.
It’s what it’s called to not give a f*ck according to Sarah Knight in her international best selling books. First let’s understand what giving a f*ck means in the first place, well it simply means to care. So when someone says, “I don’t give a f*ck about watching football”, it simply means I don’t care about football.
So, I don’t care about football, therefore I don’t spend time watching football matches, I don’t spend the energy wondering who will win champions league or whatever; and eventually I don’t spend my money on expensive football channels, betting on football or on any anything football related. So basically, football does not get any of my f*cks. [LOL]. Therefore taking calculated decisions like this will enable you to have more available time, energy, and money to spend on the things that you truly care about. That is what Sarah Knight calls as a “f*ck budget”.
We all have things we do in life that consumes enormous amount of our f*ck budget in other words Time, Energy and Money. We hardly care to stop and ask ourselves why do it in the first place if it makes us unhappy. Why care? Eventually we find it hard to wake up in the morning because we got stuck in some random work that we don’t really give a f*ck about or we give too much f*cks to what other people would think about what we do etc. Well, it’s a shame to waste your f*cks on unecessary things or work or people or relationships etc etc.
Think about it, why wake up moaning and groaning everyday to go an eight to five bullsh*t job that you do not give a f*ck about but still waste all your f*cks. If it was worth it then it would have been a different story. This is how life is wasted when we have a choice to everything that we do. Why compromise with life in the first place when you could find your dream job if you stick your mind to it.
Coming back to the initial discussion about clearing the house, life does not change when you declutter your house or room, but it changes when you do so to your mind. Why so? Inside your mind lies all the things that bring you joy, but also, all the stuffs that annoys you. If you want more joy, you will have to clear the stuffs that annoys you as simple as that. This is mental de-cluttering and is magical.
The not sorry method by Sarah Knight
- Step one: Decide what you don’t give a f*ck about.
- Step two: Don’t give a f*ck about those things
Simple isn’t it? In her not sorry method, Sarah knight says it’s all about not giving a f*ck using honesty and politeness. So there is no guilt and there is nothing to apologize for.
Let’s take a scenario, you love to watch Game of Thrones that will premier Sunday night but then you have an invite to a party that very same Sunday night. What do you do? Decide which activity brings more joy and then allocate your f*ck bucks accordingly. If you respond in a timely fashion with a “No thanks can’t make it” to that dinner party. That’s you being honest and polite, and you don’t have to be sorry about it. The “not sorry method” can be applied to anything, tasks, events, obligations even people. It is important to have a list of everything that needs de-cluttering.
We all do so many things out of obligation or guilt. People end up saying “yes” without a thought then ultimately wasting time, energy and money on annoying things. Worst of it all, you waste even more time and energy just by thinking to the things that you said “Yes” to and worrying that you will be taken for an a**hole for bailing out at the last minute. Honestly if you bail out at the last minute without having intended to go there in the first place then you are an a**hole and you should feel bad about it. Instead, pause, take a minute think about it, do some visualization exercises so you can confirm how you would feel about accepting or rejecting the invitation. You’ll be less busy, less burdened, less annoyed. You will have so much more time, energy and money.
At then end of the day, if the job sucks then don’t have to quit it, you can simply make massive, liberating and meaningful changes just by de-cluttering and making a list to the things that you truly care to give a f*ck about [the f*ck budget] and more importantly sticking to it. Realise that it is OK to say “no, thanks”, or “I don’t have time”. To be honest, de-cluttering your house takes a few days and last for a few weeks but mental de-cluttering lasts forever.